Friday, May 7, 2010

The Taylor Swift Experience

So last night my friend and I went to the Taylor Swift concert. I didn't even know she was in town until yesterday afternoon when a co-worker who had tickets she could no longer use gave them to us. "Why the heck not?" we decided. We opted for a couple of drinks and talk-time at a local brewery instead of the two opening acts (Kellie Pickler and Gloriana?). I still stand by that decision. As we walked into Wells Fargo Arena, the ticket woman enthusiastically told us "Taylor's just about to take the stage! Congratulations, you didn't miss anything!"

Boy was she right. Here's what I tweeted during the concert:

Just arrived at Taylor Swift, & I must say this chick knows how to target her demo! Hilarious & adorable.

I cannot understand a word taylor swift sings. Also want to shave her head. Her choreography = hair flipping. Yikes.

Ok, I'm sensing a connection. Taylor Swift distracts you from her off-key singing w/ an average of 28 hair flips per minute.

Taylor Swift also likes to take 20 minute breaks between songs to hug fans. At this point I wouldn't be surprised if a live unicorn shows up

Oh snap! T. Swift is covering a Justin Timberlake song! (the attempts @ dancing must be seen to be believed.)

32 hair flips in her last song. THIRTY TWO! I counted them, Ms. Swift. Are you even conscious right now?!

We have glitter guitar!! (i confess I envy her that.) fun facts: ben stiller & richie sambora's twins are her back up guitarists.


Staged catfight between Taylor & backup. Involving drums disguised as pipes & hair flipping. THIS IS REAL PEOPLE!

Thank you for letting me share the Taylor Swift Experience with you, twitter. I couldn't have made it w/out you.

So, basically the ingredients of a Taylor Swift concert are thus:

*1,000,000 hair flips. Must be full-on, bend at the waist and snap it back.
*A personal story with a moral between songs.
*A minutes long break between songs to hug audience members and ignore the cameras shoved in your face.
*Several awkward attempts at strutting.
*Rhinestones. Rhinestones. Rhinestones upon rhinestones.
*One inaccurate representation of the Shakesperean period.
*One long, dramatic pause to stare at the sea of waving glow sticks wherein you waver between batting away tears and laughing like a child.
*Several jam-alongs with extra creepy back up musicians, both male and female.

Snarkiness aside, I'll do my best to give Miss Swift her due.
She and her team know their target demographic, and cater to them perfectly. (I see a career in advertising in her future!)
Encouraging girls to play guitar and piano rather than, oh, I don't know.. Party in the USA? Amen.
And whether her awestruck appreciation of her fans is authentic or feigned isn't for me to say; I just know from the faces of the kids around me that they dug it. And humility is always a beautiful thing to see and lesson to learn.


  1. Oh, Emily. Thanks for the belly laugh. You're hilarious!

  2. Emily your too funny!!!!!! I def would have opted out of the first 2 acts, and what you said about t swift is usually the reviews of what I hear about her! But I do think what keeps her going is her personality, shes adorable and fun loving and preaches more wholesome ways than lets say other celebs <3 <3

  3. Tiffany - so glad you enjoyed it! :)

    Same to you, Tara! I love that people "get" my so-called humor :)